can't connect with serveur

i have problem when i try to connect with an externel server i get acces denid "user"@"myip"..... when i change the port i get different error :

$connection =mysql_connect("192.96.206.145:8443","user","password")or die( mysql_error() );
if(!$connection)
{
    echo 'It\'s impossible to connect with the server ! check you connection or try later ';
    //exit;

}
else
{

    if (!mysql_select_db($gamedatabase,$connection))
    {
        echo'we have problem in our server plz try again later ! ';
        //exit;

    }
    else
    {
        $etat=true;
    }
}